A case study – Andrew aged 65, retired, suffered a major heart attack.
Andrew aged sixty-five retired from his family’s bread business approximately one year ago after he suffered a major heart attack. He has three grown up children and one grandchild. His wife passed away suddenly when the children were very young.
He had put all his energy into rearing their children and building up the business so the children would have a secure future.
Up until he had his heart attack, he was working full time in his family-owned business.
He had booked in for five bio energy therapy sessions. When he attended for the first session, I explained in detail what the session would entail. He said he was originally an electrician and understood about energy and energy fields.
When I was about to start the session, he changed his mind and said he wasn’t prepared to go ahead with the therapy. He said he only came for therapy because he was pressurised by his family and friends. It was his family that felt he needed help.
He had put all his energy into rearing their children and building up the business so the children would have a secure future.
Up until he had his heart attack, he was working full time in his family-owned business.
He had booked in for five bio energy therapy sessions. When he attended for the first session, I explained in detail what the session would entail. He said he was originally an electrician and understood about energy and energy fields.
When I was about to start the session, he changed his mind and said he wasn’t prepared to go ahead with the therapy. He said he only came for therapy because he was pressurised by his family and friends. It was his family that felt he needed help.
He sat down and told me his story
I asked him if he wanted to sit and chat now that he had made the journey. He sat down and told me his story.
It all poured out. He said the day of his wife’s sudden death, it was like life had stood still and he had been shot into another space in time.
He said “I don’t think I ever really came back from this space. I went through the funeral in a daze. The only thing that was really there and kept me focused at all were my children which were my priority. After that my business, which also helped as a distraction for me.”
It all poured out. He said the day of his wife’s sudden death, it was like life had stood still and he had been shot into another space in time.
He said “I don’t think I ever really came back from this space. I went through the funeral in a daze. The only thing that was really there and kept me focused at all were my children which were my priority. After that my business, which also helped as a distraction for me.”
He had lost interest in life
Andrew explained since his heart attack and retirement he had lost interest in life. He didn’t feel like getting out of bed, and he actually felt depressed at times. He said that now the business is doing well, the children have grown up and don’t really need me anymore. He knew his diet wasn’t healthy. He was overweight and had attended a nutritionist but didn’t stick to their recommendations.
He said he knew he needed to continue the exercise program his medical team had suggested, and that he tried for a while and then thought “what’s the point”. “It’s not going to make any difference to anyone if I do or I don’t follow through with this. I tried it for my family’s sake, but it didn’t work.”
At that point I explained that trying to get well, or doing exercise, or eating healthier, or taking care of himself for the sake of anyone else, doesn’t work for anyone, not alone him! I said, it’s what he feels inside himself that matters now. Does he want to be well and healthy, but possibly not know how to get started?
He said he knew he needed to continue the exercise program his medical team had suggested, and that he tried for a while and then thought “what’s the point”. “It’s not going to make any difference to anyone if I do or I don’t follow through with this. I tried it for my family’s sake, but it didn’t work.”
At that point I explained that trying to get well, or doing exercise, or eating healthier, or taking care of himself for the sake of anyone else, doesn’t work for anyone, not alone him! I said, it’s what he feels inside himself that matters now. Does he want to be well and healthy, but possibly not know how to get started?
He felt he couldn’t move on
He said he felt something was holding him back, he felt he couldn’t move on. I asked him if it could be shock, or hurt or anger or loss, and he said it could indeed be all of these.
I explained that his reaction to all of what had happened is quite normal. I explained how the body shuts down at an energy level in order to survive, but sometimes the opportunity to resolve and heal from the loss, grief, hurt, anger, guilt or depression does not arise, especially when trying to care for his children and maintain and run a business.
He said he didn’t know who he was any more, apart from being a worry for his family. I asked him what he enjoyed doing in his younger days, and he told me he enjoyed swimming, walking and bird-watching. I asked him what he wanted for himself.
I explained that if he only wanted something for someone else’s sake it could be compared to pushing a roll of rope up a hill, it really won’t go very far, and as soon as you take your hand of it, it rolls back down the hill again.
I explained that his reaction to all of what had happened is quite normal. I explained how the body shuts down at an energy level in order to survive, but sometimes the opportunity to resolve and heal from the loss, grief, hurt, anger, guilt or depression does not arise, especially when trying to care for his children and maintain and run a business.
He said he didn’t know who he was any more, apart from being a worry for his family. I asked him what he enjoyed doing in his younger days, and he told me he enjoyed swimming, walking and bird-watching. I asked him what he wanted for himself.
I explained that if he only wanted something for someone else’s sake it could be compared to pushing a roll of rope up a hill, it really won’t go very far, and as soon as you take your hand of it, it rolls back down the hill again.
I told him that he was the only one that can focus on his health.
I said “You can get advice, you can get support, but it’s down to you to put effort into getting well. You are responsible for your own health. You can get help such as energy therapy to help decrease the intensity of all the trauma you have experienced. It can then become a memory rather than a controlling emotion, which can hold you back or prevent you from moving forward.”
I continued “This may be an opportune time to find the you that may have been put on hold all those years ago.”
He asked to postpone the sessions of bio energy for a week or two to think about all this. However, I got a call the next day to say he had made a decision and was ready to start with the therapy. He completed the five sessions of bio energy healing therapy and weeks later I received a call from him.
I continued “This may be an opportune time to find the you that may have been put on hold all those years ago.”
He asked to postpone the sessions of bio energy for a week or two to think about all this. However, I got a call the next day to say he had made a decision and was ready to start with the therapy. He completed the five sessions of bio energy healing therapy and weeks later I received a call from him.
Andrew had started a new health and exercise regime.
He continues to discover aspects of himself that he thought was buried and gone forever. He now enjoys his life, his hobbies, his family and the fun things in life. Andrew feels he can now move forward with hope, optimism and good health.
© Patricia Hesnan - (Retd Nurse, Author, Cert in B.C.S. & Stress Management, Cert in Shen Therapy & Dip. Bio Energy, Therapist, Speaker & Course Facilitator, Crania-Sacral Practitioner, Dip. Hol.T.M. Medium, Channeler). * Excerpts from her best-selling book “Be Your Own Therapist.”